When I first posted about trying to lose weight it was mid-January. It is now March. So far, I started and failed at the 17-Day Diet. I say failed because I didn’t stick with it. I started, lost about 7 or 8 pounds and stopped. Eating a diet consisting of only chicken, carrots, cucumbers and green beans just wasn’t working for me. (You can eat fish and other veggies on 17DD but my finicky palate will not allow it).
The good news is that I did not yet regain the 7 or 8 pounds I lost. The bad news is that even though I’ve been at the gym pretty consistently, I’ve not lost another pound. Not even really early in the morning with no clothes on after I’ve peed any additional possibility of weight away.
So, for about the millionth time today is day one. No, seriously. For real this time. I really mean it.
I’m hesitantly joining Weight Watchers again. Like the kind where you go to the meetings and all. This is totally not my thing. I laugh at the Jennifer Hudson commercials and the support group mentality. But since being accountable to all of you is not working I’m going to try to go be accountable to the bitch who will be weighing me in every week (she’s probably a really nice lady but unless she’s bigger than me I’m inevitably going to call her a bitch). They should cut the crap and just call these things overeaters anonymous meetings.
“My name is Kristyn and I’m a cow.”
“Hi, Kristyn.”
“Last week I hit rock bottom. I was willing to sell my body for a brownie.”
You get the idea. (And I am in no way making fun of drug users, recovering addicts, or the AA/NA system as a whole).
I figure I should pad my initial weigh-in number for this evening’s meeting so we are having pizza for lunch. And probably breadsticks, too. Don’t judge – I’m like a crack head having one last binge before entering rehab. I finally understand the no, no no Amy Winehouse was crooning about…
So I guess I should start practicing my attitude for when I become one of the skinnys. As of today I have 47 pounds to get there. The immediate goal is 10 pounds by Camille’s birthday in mid-April. Lofty, I know, but achievable. This Weight Watchers thing is not a quick fix unfortunately so I’ll be relying solely on the grace of God to keep me motivated.
In the meantime, I am looking forward to pizza and breadsticks and being entirely sedentary during my children’s nap time today. One last time.
